A Sneak Peak At Tomorrow's Phillies Lineup

Insights on building a Major League lineup from the desk of Charlie Manuel, who has used a different lineup every day for the past seven days:

1. Freddy Garcia, P
- Just to shake things up a bit

2. Pat Burrell, LF
- Remember to substitute Michael Bourn as a pinch runner in the 6th so he can strike out with the bases loaded in the 8th

3. Chase Utley, 2B
- Gee, this Sharpie smells so nice, I almost can't hear Pretty Boy begging for a day off

4. Jim Thome, DH

Whoops, just went on autopilot for a second there.

4. Jimmy Rollins, SS
- A projected 56 HRs? To cleanup you go!

5. The Phillie Phanatic, RF
- Need a widebody masher in the five-hole; wonder if his strike zone will be too big though; his physique reminds me of someone familiar

6. Greg Dobbs, 1B
- Ryan needs to regain his confidence by sitting on the bench next to Chris Coste; plus his name rhymes with "Hobbs" and The Natural was a sweet movie

7. Wesbraham Nunelms, 3B
- Football coaches get to make "game time decisions," why can't I? (Also: talk to Gillick about creating a new starting pitcher from the combined DNA of Charles Nagy and Bartolo Colon)

8. Carlos Ruiz, C
- Barajas played last night, right?

9. Aaron Rowand, CF
- My baseball instincts tell me he's in for a slump, but he kind of looks like that Ali G guy, so I can't bench him

Reminder: clutch the dugout fence and grit your teeth extra-hard tonight. We're on ESPN, after all.