Sunday, September 16, 2007

Do You Recall...Tomas Perez?

For all the guff Pat Gillick has taken about his misfires on the 2007 Phillies starting rotation, he deserves credit for plucking the once-anonymous Greg Dobbs away from the Mariners at the beginning of the season. The Gregulator has been an able platoon man at third base and in the outfield, but he has shined this season as a pinch hitter and especially in "clutch" situations, where his numbers are far superior to his season totals (in an admittedly smaller sample size). With a pinch-hit grand slam that put the Mets away for good this afternoon, Dobbs and Jayson Werth (when Victorino is healthy) are creating the kind of lefty punch from the bench reminiscent of the days of Del Unser.

These bench weapons are a key element in the Phils' never-let-up offense, waiver-wire godsends for an historically weak area of the franchise. But do you recall a bench hero of the recent past? Do you recall...Tomas Perez?


In the year 2000, the faces of the Fightins were the often-dour pusses of Scott Rolen and Bobby Abreu, who were managed by an near-comatose Terry Francona. Imagine the system shock when Tomas Perez, the one-man Animal House, came walking into the clubhouse. Not surprisingly, it was presence (more so than his play) that would greatly influence the character of the club:

Tomas Perez Phillies Statistics: .249 AVG, .301 OBP, 20 HR, 128 RBI

After an April cup of coffee, Perez stuck with the Phillies for good in August 2000 as a utility infielder in the waning days of the Desi Relaford-Mickey Morandini dynasty. He was used primarily as a second baseman until the arrivals of Placido Polanco and Chase Utley, when his role changed to that of the main pinch-hitter off the bench.

The only flaw in this plan was that Tomas, a "glove man" defensive replacement (which is kind of a stretch in and of itself), wasn't quite up to the task. In 122 pinch-hit plate appearances between 2003-2005, he collected a total of 17 hits and 9 walks.

However, his bat was never truly a part of the Tomas Perez legend. In fact, his play on the field has little to do with his semi-notoriety. He is far more well-known in Phillies circles for his free-spirited approach to the game and his pranksterism. As far as the Phillies are concerned, Perez is the inventor of the post-game shaving cream facial and the progenitor of the "lovable loon" persona that Shane Victorino currently exhibits. (Notice, however, that Perez originally preferred the full-blown shaving cream pie, which requires a far greater craftsmanship than Victorino's hastily-constructed "Barbasol on a towel" mechanism.)

At some time during his Phillies tenure, Perez also acquired the half-disparaging nickname, "The Secret Weapon." This fad hit its peak in 2004, when he led the Phillies to two nonconsecutive walk-off wins (one of them a pinch-hit home run) which were both achieved off of Antonio Alfonseca in one of life's great (and yet somehow so fitting and cruel) ironies.

I always feel like Tomas tolerated this good-natured dig at his athletic abilities because he so often had the last laugh. Where else could he get to play a game he loved in front of people who loved him back, all the while making fun of stiffs like Travis Lee in Phillies promo commercials? His personality kind of subverts the whole point of these "DYR..." articles--nobody's going to groan when they remember his name.

More importantly, Perez's personality subverted much of the post-1994 strike culture of the Philadelphia franchise. He was something of a throwback to the days of Dykstra, Daulton, and the Krukker, and it seems a little more than coincidence to me that his arrival corresponded with a revival of the team's fortunes thanks to several "Phillies with flair." Tomas helped us appreciate a cut-up like Doug Glanville and readied us for the shock of a Ryan Howard--a star Phillie who actually looked like he enjoyed playing the game and appreciated the attention he received for it. Hell, even Chase Utley is doing goofy Tastykake advertisements now.

I like to think that it was the influence of Tomas and his exuberant ribbing of the tired, lame, and unstylish, in some small way, that allowed Jimmy Rollins to stick it to the Mets this spring in his infamous "team to beat" remark. Lo and behold, the Phillies have swept the Mets again, thanks in no small part to the undeniably cool J-Roll. Somewhere, Tomas Perez is grinning a mile wide.

For giving Phillies fans a reason to smile again, I fondly recall Tomas "The Secret Weapon" Perez.

Tomas Perez Statistics [Baseball Reference]

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