Catching Up With The People We'd Rather Forget

I'll admit it: sometimes I feel bad for making fun of Von Hayes. In terms of hype and insurmountable expectations, he was his era's A-Rod (without the prodigious talent). The insanity of the five-for-one trade that brought him to Philadelphia completely overshadowed anything he would accomplish in a Phillies uniform. There's nothing he could have done, short of curing ALS, to redeem himself. Philly expected the second coming of Mickey Mantle, but what they got was a rich man's Bobby Higginson.

I was pleasantly surprised to see the Phillies catching up with Hayes after all these years and genuinely pleased to hear that he was having some recent success as a manager in the A's minor league system. It seems odd that an organization would so fondly remember a player so vilified in his time--until you realize that there are few athletes that don't receive prodigious criticism in Philadelphia at one point or another.

One of the goals of this blog is to preserve the historical mediocrity and ineptness that makes Philadelphia sports so unique. Before the Phillies stole my thunder, I was planning a feature on "the Five Most Undistinguished Phillies Outfielders (and Infielders, Pitchers, etc) Since 1990." While compiling an initial list for this project, I ran into a problem. I had only gone back about six seasons, and there were already too many superbly undistinguished Phillies to limit the list to five.

I've decided instead to start what I hope will become a running feature at the Baker Bowl in opposition to the "Catching Up With..." features in the mainstream media that mostly fawn over former greats and fan favorites--"Do You Recall...", a collection of Phillies that have won our hearts with their statistical flukes, random All-Star appearances, much greater success with other teams, and trivial tidbits and have played in red pinstripes no earlier than 1992.

Why 1992? That was the Vonster's last season in the majors and, coincidentally, the beginning of any specific memories I have of being burdened with the birthright of Philadelphia fandom.

The envelope, please:

Do You Recall...Rob Ducey?

A stalwart of the Phillies bench for 246 games from 1999-2001, Ducey began and ended his career in his native Canada with the Blue Jays and Expos, respectively. However, his star never shined brighter than when he wore a Phillies uniform. Primarily a backup to the Ron Gant-Doug Glanville-Bobby Abreu outfields of that era (cripes), Robbie nevertheless complied 85 hits in his Phillies career thanks to his status as "the least inept guy we can send up there to pinch-hit."

What truly cements Ducey's place in Phillies lore is his legendary 2000 season. Though he was batting a torrid .189 through 70 games, the Phils traded him to Toronto on July 26 for a player to be named later. This is what is commonly referred to as a "steal." Rob Ducey's mother probably wouldn't trade for Rob Ducey at this point in his career.

Two weeks later, the Blue Jays acquired Mickey Morandini from the Philadelphia for a player to be named later. That player was...Rob Ducey. Essentially, Ducey was traded for himself. Even Pujols couldn't pull that off.

A final note on Mr. Ducey: in his 14-year career, Rob collected a hit against 29 of the current 30 existing major league franchises. The thirtieth? None other than the Philadelphia Phillies.

For his unswerving loyalty to the Phillies, I fondly recall Rob "The Prodigal Son" Ducey.

Catching Up With...Von Hayes [Phillies.com]
Rob Ducey Statistics [Baseball-Reference]